Why You Feel Empty

- – The story of Richard Cory illustrates the stark contrast between external success and internal emptiness. Despite his wealth and admiration, Cory took his life, demonstrating that external achievements do not guarantee happiness. – The concept of flourishing goes beyond just feeling good; it includes having purpose, social connections, and a sense of growth. Sociologist Corey Keyes argues that focusing on meaningful relationships and personal growth can help overcome feelings of emptiness. – Languishing is described as a state where individuals feel "half alive" or "dying inside." It is characterized by a sense of invisibility and the absence of both negative and positive feelings, making it distinct from depression. – Social isolation is a significant driver of languishing. Corey Keyes emphasizes that lacking warm, trusting relationships and a sense of community can lead to feelings of emptiness and being unwanted, which are core aspects of languishing. – Supportive environments play a crucial role in flourishing. Research on medical professionals and mothers caring for children with disabilities shows that strong social support can mitigate stress and promote well-being, even in demanding situations. – Personal growth and play are essential components of flourishing. Activities that involve skill development and joy contribute to a sense of accomplishment and well-being. For example, the creation of the pinball machine during the Great Depression provided joy and a sense of achievement. – Corey Keyes highlights that feelings of emptiness and loss of purpose can affect anyone, regardless of their external success. Through examples like Jonas, who felt purposeless in his eighties, and Denise, a new mother experiencing postpartum emptiness, Keyes illustrates that significant life changes can lead to such feelings. – Feeling needed and having a sense of belonging are critical in combating languishing and promoting mental well-being. Keyes' personal near-death experience underscores the importance of being needed, as his wife’s reassurance saved him from contemplating suicide. – Flourishing involves more than just happiness; it includes meaning, purpose, and social connections, often involving loss and grief. Prioritizing deeper achievements over mere happiness can lead to sustainable well-being, as noted by Corey Keyes and Aristotle. – The episode reveals the paradox of external success and internal emptiness, showing that individuals who appear to have everything might still feel a void if they lack meaningful social connections and a sense of purpose.